Thursday, September

Thursday, September

Tonight is the grand night when my four sisters and I will attend the ball thrown by the young man that has recently occupied Netherfield Park. We have been impatiently waiting for this night to arrive. Father has mentioned that the young man, Mr. Bingley, that Netherfield it now occupied is a man of large fortune. Mother is very much distressed at the fact that before the recent arrival of Mr. Bingley, a household of eighteen was slaughtered by a horde of the living dead. Father is more interested in the fact that Mr. Bingley could be a fine match for one of his daughters.

My sisters and I have been vigorously primping to look our very best for this most important occasion. I am sure all the young ladies of this household pray that the zombies do not rudely interrupt this joyous evening. Most unfortunately a recent rain has softened the ground enough for zombies to become an issue once again.

Following the ball…

As the evening proceeded the event was not as wonderful as planned. Once arriving to the ball and being joined to a dance with three bachelors, I decided that I would sit for a dance. I was then invited to dance with a man going by Mr. Darcy. In midst of our dance he proceeded to tell how uncommonly pretty my younger sister was, and how agreeable he believed her to be. If Mr. Darcy had meant to talk to my sister then he should have approached her for a dance. I was enraged that he had danced with me trying to get to my sister. Once the dance ended Mr. Darcy excused himself to matters outside. I reached down to my dagger concealed beneath my dress, I meant to follow Mr. Darcy outside and inform how very well trained the Bennets are.

“ No sooner had I grabbed the handle of my weapon than a chorus of screams filled the assembly hall.” (pg.14) Immediately my sisters and I formed a five-pointed star, working our way across the hall slaughtering unmentionables as we moved. By the time we had reached the exit all the zombies lay beheaded on the no longer shined floor. As the evening began to close mother concluded that she had over all enjoyed the evening, which all the five other young ladies from the Bennet household agreed. Although to most, this evening would have been unforgettably horrendous; to the Bennet household it was just another evening.

Wednesday, September

Wednesday, September

Most recently Mr. Collins the cousin of my father sent a letter informing that he shall soon be stopping to boarder with us. At first mother was quite excited that a young, single, and fairly well-off man was entering our home; a home where young, single ladies who were looking for a husband were currently living. Then father with a much amused face informed mother in that the dear Mr. Collins would be the man to turn us ladies out of the house once he had passed. “ Oh! My dear, pray do not talk of this odious man,” (pg. 50) were mother’s exact words. Within the next week Mr. Collins arrived and settled in to the guest room of our home, mother eyeing him through his whole first week.

So as the days carried on, I realized that Mr. Collins most certainly was eyeing me and today my most extreme fret was confirmed. Mr. Collins asked me for my hand. “I was horrified at the thought of marrying a man whose only skill with a knife was cutting slivers off gorgonzola” (pg. 71). I attempted to explain to Mr. Collins that it was impossible for me to do anything other than decline his proposal, but he refused to listen. Mr. Collins told me that it is not unusual for young ladies to decline the ones they secretly mean to accept. With a none but harsh tone I said, “ I am perfectly serious in my refusal.” (pg. 85) At this point in time I withdrew from the breakfast -room that contained Mr. Collins, as he began on a second proposal. I could no longer listen to his pathetic pleading in hopes that I would revise my current answer.

Mother had dawdled about on the other side of the door of the breakfast-room impatiently waiting the end result of the conference. When she heard the offer that I was refusing, she rushed to father. Father was unmoved at the situation, which had occurred this morning. Concluding that if I were to marry Mr. Collins that he would never see me again, so in the end it was decided that I would not take Mr. Collins hand in marriage. Which left me one of the happiest ladies in the house at that moment.

Friday, October.

Friday, October

In my latest post I told of the day where I was asked by Mr. Collins for my hand in marriage. What I failed to inform you of was that less then a week later he began to enjoy the sight and presence of my neighbor and family friend Ms. Charlotte Lucas. Before the gossip of my refusal died down it seemed they where engaged. I had never fathomed the two, who in my opinion are complete opposites, would join each other in marriage. Dear Charlotte is a calm and peaceful spirit, when Mr. Collins is a nothing of the sort. The Bennett household had nothing to show but utterly horrified faces when we heard of the news!

On to more news…

So since the marriage of my delightful friend she has moved with her new husband to the town Hunsford, to our dismay. Three months have passed away, and I thought it a appropriate tribute to our friendship to visit. Not to mention that the absence has weakened my disgust of Mr. Collins. Which in my opinion is for the worst.

The following morning along with my aunt I began my journey of twenty-four miles. To protect us in the incident of zombies, the coachman had hired two men to assist us. Besides the men, that I doubted could provide much protection, I was also fully armed. After a while of riding the chaise lurched to a halt. This followed with shattering screams and the crack of gunpowder. I pulled back the curtain and saw a sight I could hardly believe! There where no less then two- hundred creatures of the dead scraping at our chaise. I sprang out of and onto the roof of the carriage and assessed this situation we were in. I realized that I was unable to behead this many creatures, before they reach the horses, which would guarantee being doomed to a slow death. I sprang to the drivers box. I cracked the whip, and we were off at quite an extreme speed until the danger had passed.

When I was finally at Mrs. Collins’ home I rested for the remainder of the evening. The attack of so many zombies at once had made me feel as if I had not slept in an entire year. I hope to never see a sight of two- hundred zombies ever again but if I do then I know I will succeed in beheading and burning them all.

Tuesday, October.

Tuesday, October.

After reaching the home of my dear friend Charlotte I had the great honor of meeting the one I try to model myself after, Lady Catherine. Lady Catherine is known to be the best worrier that has ever walked. I never had dreamt that I would have such an honor of meeting such a soul if I had not been invited to the tea planned by my dear friend Charlotte.

Awaiting the hour when I would meet the one I longed for the most was pure agony. To take my mind off of my uncontrollable emotions I walked through the park. Finally the hour arrived and my lovely friend and I traveled to the house of Lady Catherine. Once we arrived we had tea and Charlotte and I made our way to the carriage. I realized that the one I had so admired had been nothing like I thought. Lady Catherine was nothing but an insolent snob who insisted that I would never be a warrior as great as she. So I challenged her best ninjas to a match to follow on the continuing day.

The next day

Today, Mr. Collins insisted he tag along and see the out come of this entertainment. He brought along his wife Charlotte. When we arrived the dojo and ninjas were prepared for the fighting match. Ms. Catherine did not fail to remind me that her ninjas would show no mercy. How dare she offend my honor by insulting me by telling me of things I most certainly already am aware! I am a trained warrior and surpass the skill of any ninja!

The first ninja flew towards me with his katana, with only inches separating our bodies I sliced my weapon through his stomach. Before the body had struck the floor the second ninja charged unleashing throwing stars as he advanced. Shielding myself with my katana I snatched the fourth star in mid air throwing it back at its originator. This instantly beheaded the second ninja. Before the most deadly third ninja could approach with his Katana I projected my weapon pinning him to the wall.

As I removed my blindfold I shot Lady Catherine a look of success. She left the dojo without giving compliment to my skills. I do not doubt that Lady Catherine will not insult my abilities once again, but I will always have the pride of winning of the three ninjas of the respected warrior Lady Catherine.

Thursday, November

Thursday, November

Through out the course of Mr. Darcy’s and my acquaintance I have despised him more than imaginable. We have constantly bickered and exposed the hateful people we can be. At one point I kicked Mr. Darcy and my kick landed square on his shoulder sending him forcefully into the mantle shattering its edge. You may wonder what brought upon this act of such furry but I tell you I have a respectable reason. Mr. Darcy had driven me to my last end; he had insulted me, and been rude to my family. At that time I actively believed that if he was to fall off this world I would not be aware of his absence. I never wanted to see his face, hear his voice, or hear of him in a conversation again.

But my mind has been drastically changed. After I had kicked him in to the mantle I could not escape from thinking of our encounter, Mr. Darcy face was engraved in my memory. As I was pondering this while walking in the park he approached me with a letter, after reading it I was speechless. In this letter he explained his reasoning for the insults and though I am the last thing from gullible, I understood his reasoning. In fact his cruelness was in pure regard of himself and the ones he loved. Contemplating the contents of the letter left me realizing that would most certainly have done the same for my beloved ones. I saw Mr. Darcy in a new light from what I had believed. He was the man I had always hoped for.

Then I realized that I had made possibly the most drastic mistake of my life I had pushed the one that I had fallen for away. I had never been so ashamed of myself, “I had been blind, partial, prejudice, absurd.” (pg.165) “ I who have prided myself on my discernment! Who have often valued myself on mind and body!” (Pg. 165) I am humiliated at this discovery.” How can I ever show my face in his presence again, he must greatly despise me? Now I can only hope for the forgivingness that I know he has to shine through and to accept me, for I will never forget this tragedy, until I die.